I have resided in this slice of Paradise known as Kingston for 30 years. We moved here in late winter, as the after-effects of the Blizzard of 1978 mercifully began to subside. I consider this 30-year milestone as significant; after all, it’s the longest we’ve lived in one place. When we first arrived there was but one traffic light, you could telephone your neighbors by dialing the last four digits of their numbers, and I still had hair on the top of my head. But, I digress.

Suffice it to say that, when I reflect on how much the town has changed, I feel as though I have lived here all my life. Heaven forbid, however, that I share that viewpoint with any of my "true townie" friends. To the bona fide Kingston natives, anyone who was not born here or didn’t move here within a week of his/her birth is an outsider.

In the eyes of the natives, I am not a "townie." It doesn’t matter that I have paid my dues, put down roots, and have no plans to go elsewhere (the exceptions being if I am offered the Vice Presidential slot by either Obama or McCain, or I somehow manage to find a way to earn a living up in Vermont). To the long-timers, I will always be the guy from Marshfield who wandered a few towns south and never went home.

As I pondered this circumstance (during a break in the All-Star game when I realized that I had another column due shortly), I wondered what newcomers to town must feel like. If I, a three-decade resident, have doubts about being considered one of "Kingston’s own," what about these unfortunate souls who came here three, four or five years ago, naively believing that they had found a better life and would be a welcome part of the community?

To those of you who have lived here since birth, all I can say (and perhaps a bit defensively) is, "I wasn’t born here. But I got here as fast as I could." "Townie status" should represent more than simply where you were born; what you know about the place you have chosen to call home should be factored into the equation.

So, in an attempt to help my fellow non-natives lay claim to "true Kingstonian" or "townie" status, I have devised the following simple test of Kingston folklore and trivia. Try it! If you achieve a high enough score, you’ll have a compelling argument the next time one of those smart-alecs says you haven’t lived here long enough to be taken seriously. If your score is low, then perhaps you can try the re-test at a later date. Good luck. And remember, no cheating.

 

 

1.The AhDeNah is

a. A native dish with an excessive amount of curry

b. A curse been passed down by the ancients who inhabited what is the present-day Camp Nekon

c. Arabic for the expression "Kingston really rocks!"

d. All of the above

e. None of the above

2. Which of the following did NOT happen in Kingston?

a. A Rocky Nook scientist developed a cloning kit

b. The Board of Selectmen were "read their rights" over a conservation issue

c. The irreverent Charles Laquidara (WBCN fame) was a guest of honor at a fundraiser

d. Former President Jimmy Carter was on hand for the dedication of the Pyramid Independence Mall

e. Strangely, they all happened here!

3. The reason that the town-owned land called Camp Nekon has never been developed is that

a. Development was forbidden as part of a deed dating back to Governor Bradford

b. The land is infested with alligators

c. The land is protected because red-bellied turtles have been seen on it

d. No one knows exactly where Camp NeKon is

e. What do you mean it isn’t developed? There are two high-rise condominiums there.

f. None of the above

4. Daniel Lugosch was

a. A draft pick for the New England Patriots

b. A selectman in Plymouth

c. A principal in the original Pyramid (Independence) Mall development

d. None of the above

5. Which of the following Governors and future Governors have actually visited Kingston? (Hint: There may be more than one correct answer).

a. Governor Michael Dukakis

b. Governor Bill Weld

c. Governor Mario Cuomo

d. None of them have ever been here.

6. The reason that so many people from Kingston despise Duxbury is:

a. Because they can!

b. Because Duxbury refused to allow the construction of a mall or shopping center, saying "Send it to Kingston. They’ll allow anything in."

c. Too many reasons to enumerate.

d. People from Kingston do not dislike people from Duxbury; the statement is completely false.

7. Kingston has a geographic claim to fame in that one of the following items can be found within its borders. Which one?

a. The Equator (a small section of it near the Route 44 extension)

b. Stellwagen Bank

c. The Bering Straits

d. The 42nd parallel

 

 

8. Copper Beech Drive was once a two-way street.

- True
- False

9. The present day Stop & Shop Plaza was once home to the Kingston Drive-In.

- True
- False

10. Kingston’s jail was formerly housed in the basement of Town Hall at 23 Green Street.

- True
- False

11. Tom O’Brien was the first individual to serve Kingston as a State Representative.

- True
- False

 

 

Question 1: E. If you answered correctly, give yourself 5 points. If you answered "C," you get 2 points for creativity and enthusiasm. If you answered a or b, however, you start with minus two points and you are probably too gullible to be considered a serious Kingstonian.

Question 2: D. Give yourself 5 points for answering correctly.

Question 3: F. Give yourself 5 points for correct answer. If you answered "a," subtract 2 points. You should know better than to believe something as outrageous as that – even here in Kingston.

Question 4: C. 5 points for the right answer. If you chose A or B, deduct 2 points. And, start reading local newspapers more carefully.

Question 5: A and B. Bill Weld when he was running for Governor in 1990, and Michael Dukakis the same year, two years after he lost the Presidency. Governor Dukakis came to a cookout at the Kingston Housing Authority. 5 points for A, 5 points for B.

Question 6: Split decision here. If you answered "A," it’s 10 points and the mark of a true Kingstonian. If you chose "B," give yourself 1 point. If you chose "C," you played it safe. 2 points. If you chose "D," deduct 5 points and consider moving somewhere else. "True Kingstonian" status may elude you for the rest of your life.

Question 7: D. 5 points if answered correctly. If you picked either "A" or "C," deduct two points from your total score and enroll in a geography class.

Question 8: TRUE. 5 points if you answered correctly.

Question 9: TRUE. 5 points.

Question 10: TRUE. 10 points. However, if it was just a lucky guess and not something you actually knew, 5 points.

Question 11: FALSE. 5 points for correct answer. In recent history, Rob Kraus and Peter Forman preceded Tom O’Brien. By the way, if you STILL believe Tom O’Brien is the guy who also sells cars, deduct 5 points because you ought to know better by now.

 

 

Under 30: While you may be a very nice person with many positive attributes, yours is an utterly hopeless case. You know next to nothing about the town you dare to call home. In your case, the native Kingstonians probably have it right. You aren’t one of us (I mean, one of "them."). Nothing short of outright cheating will improve your exam score. Consider moving to Plympton.

30-39: You are seriously knowledge-deficient in all matters pertaining to Kingston. Sure, you may pay property taxes here, and possibly you’ve even attended a community event or two, but you might as well hail from Montana, or Dorchester. Your plight is not quite as hopeless as those scoring under 30, but you’re going to have a hard time convincing anyone that you belong here. Fortunately, it’s a buyer’s market in real estate right now. Consider taking advantage of that and moving out of town.

40-49: You have at least a rudimentary knowledge about your adopted hometown, but don’t quit your day job to go on the "Kingston Trivial Pursuit" circuit anytime soon. You probably still require a GPS to find your way to certain parts of town, such as Rocky Nook. Try befriending a native Kingstonian (if you can find one who will talk to you), and implore this individual to mentor you in Kingston lore. Otherwise, you might as well wear an "I’m an outsider" button for the rest of your life.

50-59: You are a promising individual, but you’re not quite there yet. Although you do show some awareness of your surroundings and the town you call home, you need to improve your score to qualify for Kingstonian status. Try to get yourself invited to cocktail parties where long-time residents talk about the way things used to be here. Take notes if necessary.

60 or above: Go to the head of the class. You may proudly consider yourself a true Kingstonian, even if you just moved here yesterday. You have an uncanny grasp of the details that make Kingston a unique place to live. Congratulations – or condolences, depending on your point of view.